


Together

by koolio19



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, Philinda - Freeform, season 5
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 06:51:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18795178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koolio19/pseuds/koolio19
Summary: One-shot. The lighthouse is under attack and May must try to get a dying Coulson to safety, but at least they are together.





	Together

**Author's Note:**

> This was written several episodes prior to the end of season 5, so it is not canon compliant. Hope you enjoy!

“Come on, Phil. Stay Awake,” May called to me as she gripped tightly to my waist, my arm slung around her narrow shoulders. She was practically dragging me along beside her as we tried to hurry through the darkened halls of the Lighthouse. I didn’t respond, unable to even teasingly chide her for using the same words that I had said to her not that long ago when our roles had been reversed and it was I who had led her through the bowels of a Soviet submarine base. That day seemed like a lifetime ago, but, in reality, only a few agonizing weeks had passed. 

I concentrated all my attention into putting one foot securely in front of the other. My vision was becoming tunneled, the edges of it stained dark, waxing and waning with each breath. This Kree poison in my chest was like a beast all its own. Its hands gripped firmly around my lungs squeezing hard, slowly constricting tighter and tighter. Its claws poised to deliver the final, lethal assault to my heart at any moment. 

I heard the familiar sound of gunfire start again from behind us, and May unceremoniously shoved me behind several large crates as the bullets whizzed past our heads. I collapsed onto the floor, my failing body unable to catch myself. On shaking arms, I pushed myself up until my back was resting against the crates providing us cover.

I shook my head to try and clear away some of the blackness. I should have stayed on the Zephyr with Fitz and Simmons. I should have agreed when May told me to rest. Instead, I had insisted that a leisurely walk around the base with her as she did her daily routine would be good exercise for me. May had eyed me with an unhappy purse of her lips before relenting with a sigh. No matter her displeasure at my stubbornness, I could tell that she was content to at least be with me. Both she and I had not anticipated that the base would soon be infiltrated by Hale’s men. Now, all I was doing was slowing May down, and putting her and the team in danger.

I looked over and watched as May fired a few shots around the corner of the crate. She then pulled back, dropping an empty magazine from her pistol and replacing it with a full one. The shots had quieted for the moment, and when she peered around the crate again, she seemed satisfied with what she saw. She turned back to me, holstered her weapon, and moved to kneel beside me. 

“That should buy us a few minutes,” she said in a low voice as she gave me a quick once over, before silently slipping her fingers inside the collar of my shirt and pressed them against my pulse point. After a moment, she pursed her lips together and moved her hand away, but not before the soft sweep of her fingers reached up to brush over the black lines that now curved up and over my jaw bone.

“We have to get you back to the Zephyr, to Simmons,” she said, her words were firm, but with an underlying tone of worry that only someone who knew her as well as I did would have noticed. She carefully rose from her crouched position and peered over the top of our barricade before lowering back down. “It’s all clear. We need to keep going.”

She began to reach for my arm, but I pulled away. “You should go. The team could be in trouble, and you’ll get to them faster without me,” I told her, my words unintentionally tired and soft, but it was the most I could muster.

Even though the dark haze distorting my vision, the look of disbelief and hurt that crossed her face was enough to make the black beast in my chest rear its head and squeeze my heart painfully.

“I am not leaving you here, Phil,” she growled, her eyes firm and unyielding. “You’ll be a sitting duck. This isn’t a defensible position.”

“May, I’m dying anyway,” I said bluntly, looking at her hard, imploring her to see reason. “It won’t be much longer now. You know I’m right.”

She shook her head, jaw tight, “I don’t care if I have to drag you. You’re coming. You’re a part of this team too. I am not giving up on you. Do you hear me, Phil?” Her eyes were hard, and her hands tight on my arms. “You are not giving up!” 

I sighed but allowed her to pull my arm around her shoulders and stand without further argument. Arguing with her was impossible under normal circumstances, but right now I didn’t have the energy or the time to break her resolve. 

With her now supporting even more of my weight, our movement was slow going as we moved through the empty hallways towards the Hangar. We were almost there when suddenly I was falling to the ground again as gunfire erupted in front of us. I landed flat on my back, the air being forcefully knocked from my already burning lungs in the process. May was moving instantly, pistol raised and firing back as she threw herself in front of me, and before I had even managed to regain my breath, the gunfire had stopped. 

All I could hear was the sounds of both of our equally harsh breathing in the now silent corridor. She looked back at me meeting my eyes with a strange, distressed look on her face, a look that made the blood freeze in my veins, before she half lowered, half fell to the ground beside me. The surge of panicked adrenaline that flooded my system granted me enough power to force myself to get up on my knees and look down at her. Her eyes were squeezed shut and her breathing was quickly becoming short and erratic, but that wasn’t what caught my horrified eye. No, what drew my attention was the three large spots of blood that were now staining the dark shirt on her abdomen.

The sudden wave of terror that gripped me was almost enough to cause the darkness on the edges of my vision to consume me, as my heart and lungs seized hard in panic. The only spot of light that I could see through the tunnel of blackness was red, the deep red of blood as it seeped freely from her wounds. “No,” I croaked as I reached out and pressed a shaking hand over the largest red spot, which was centered directly below her sternum. She groaned at the contact and raised a hand to grasp my wrist weakly, holding on to me.

Just as quickly as the grimace on her face appeared, it smoothed out as she took a breath and she opened her eyes. “At least this will break the time loop,” she said in a rough whisper as she looked up at me. Her lips twitching up into a small smile.

“May, no,” I croaked again as tears sprung to my eyes. The blood that was flowing easily around my fingers was a sure indication that there was no way to stop this. No way to save her. Her wounds were too extensive. She was right, this would change everything, not only for the world but for me. Without her beside me, there was no driving force telling me to keep going, to keep hoping, to keep living. Without her, there was nothing.

The flare of pain that suddenly assaulted my chest was new. It shot through my body like lightning sending my nerves alight and making me double over with a cry of pain.

“Phil,” May cried, her faint voice filled with urgency and worry, but I couldn’t answer her. My voice was currently as powerless as my body to fight the poison that was assaulting it. When the fire in my nerves finally seemed to diminish, I found that I was bent over her, my forehead resting on her chest, her hands holding my head gently in place to steady me. I opened my eyes and tried to raise my head to look at her, but the room began to spin and I almost lost my balance before resting my head back down. “Easy,” she whispered, her breath warm against my temple.

After a moment, I tried to move again, this time more successfully as I decided to lower myself to the ground beside her rather than sit back up. My hand slid off her wound, moving across her stomach and around her waist, gently pulling her closer to me. With a low, ground-out groan she aided me and rolled onto her side so that we were facing each other. In the small space between us, our hands laid limply on top of each other as we both tried to regain the semblance of a steady breath.

I just stared at her. Her face was close to mine, her head pillowed on my extended arm. I could see just how much blood she had already lost by the paleness of her face and the cold sweat that had broken out on her forehead. I had seen that look before on other agents and enemies alike, but I had prayed to never see it on her, that look of imminent death as it consumed her. “Melinda,” I called softly. Her tired eyes lifted to mine. “I’m sorry.”

She looked at me, the expression shinning in her eyes was so open and sincere despite the pain and exhaustion, that I thought I was looking at her twenty years ago, “I’m not,” she said softly. “This is right where I should be -” she took in a painful, gasping inhale before continuing, “with you.” She dragged her hand up across the ground and laid it against my chest limply. “I love you, Phil.”

The barely coherent words fell off her lips in a slur, but I had never heard words so clearly in my entire life. I couldn’t hold back the tears that fell down my face. I leaned forward and press my lips softly to hers, my hand coming up to cradle the back of her head. “I love you too, Mel -” I whispered against her lips, the rest of her name choked off by a small sob. I leaned my forehead against hers, my eyes squeezed shut as I swallowed the next sob that threatened to erupt from my throat. I opened my mouth again, our uneven breaths mingling together in the air between us, “You mean everything to me.”

I felt more than saw the smile on her face, she didn’t seem to have the strength to open her eyes, but the large smile that graced her face seemed almost involuntary, more energy to contain it than to let it happen. I smiled tearfully back and kissed her once more. The new coldness of her lips traveled into my body, chilling me to the bone and causing a shudder to run down my spine.

I was then forced to lean away from her, my energy almost extinguished. Unable to fight it, I allowed my body to roll back until it was resting flat on the ground and mustering up all the energy I had left, I gently pulled May’s small body with me. Once we stilled again, her head was pillowed on my chest over my slowing heart, and my arm was wrapped around her back holding her flush against me. I reached up and grasped the small hand she had rested on my chest, and closed my eyes, content to just listen to her breathing. The breathing that seemed to be getting quieter with each uneven breath she took. I could feel her warm blood continuing to flow against my side, soaking into my clothes and pooling beneath us, but I ignored it. Instead, I closed my eyes and focused on the feel of holding her in my arms. After all this time and after all that had happened, the sensation was one of peace and I held onto it like a lifeline. 

We just laid there together in the corridor and drifted off. I let myself imagine that we were safe at the Playground before all this started- before space, before ghost rider, before LMD’s and the Framework. I imagined that we were in the bed that we shared, drifting off into a peaceful sleep, content to just hold each other after an uneventful day with our team, our family. I let myself believe that we would wake up tomorrow morning with nowhere to be and no crisis to deal with. I would watch her do tai-chi, serenity and strength flowing off her as she moved, while I make us breakfast. I would wrap my arms around her and kiss her, making her smile brightly. We would have an infinite amount of time to just be together, to love each other, to cherish each other. There would be no more pain, or fear, or loss. Only love. And we would be together. That was all that mattered.

********

That would be how the team would come to find them later, still wrapped in each other’s arms. The two could have been mistaken for being asleep, their faces both an expression of peace, but the frantic fingers that Daisy and Jemma pressed against their necks would find no pulses, no heartbeats. In the same moment that SHIELD lost its Director and his right hand, their team lost the two people who were like the mother and father to their little, wayward family. It hurt, and it would hurt for a long time. Their only solace was the fact that they at least went together. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it... or at least don't hate me too much!


End file.
